Parents

People you think will always be there, they bring us into the world full of hope and passion, we grow, taking on their values and many life lessons. There comes a point when we morph into our own person and see the world through different eyes often ignoring what we had been taught as we grew.  Sometimes this gets us into trouble, more often than not we stick with  the safe path and make our way to being the people they had always hoped for.

As we grow up they grow older we often take them for granted not giving them enough time. At this point I start humming the 'Cats in the Cradle by Harry Chapin', not that it applied to me because my parents were always there, though I think it can apply in the reverse particularly in the later verse when the child has grown,

'Well he came from college just the other day
So much like a man I just had to say,
"Son, I’m proud of you, can you sit for a while?"
He shook his head, and he said with a smile

"What I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys
See you later, can I have them please?"

This is what we did, blowing in and out as we pleased, borrowing this and that, be it food or money to keep us going without a thought of what Mum and Dad may want from the relationship. Then one day you have your own family and along with you they are guiding your children. We sit back and wonder at their abilities, love and faith in their family.

They are comfortable with each other after many years in my case fifty two. Then out of the blue one is gone, what can you do, what can you say, there is nothing! What do you say to your grieving parent when you are straining to cope with your own feelings, no one can know what they are going through. How can we, they have trundled through the majority of their life with this one person being there all the time through troubles and happiness then poof, they are on their own. Adjusting to whatever might come next, doing all for themselves, undertaking  activities  not experienced before, like fueling the car.  Time starts to heal the remaining parent life opens up new opportunities, friends, hobbies and a world of being on their own  coping with whatever comes their way.  With all the new-found confidence and certainty that they will cope with the support of their family and friends.

We are now down to one parent, but hey, one is better than none. For I know it is I who will crumble as the next one falls.

Parents